COLUMN: Bill Nemitz

Differences dissolve as Milo helps a family in need

Copyright © 2006 Blethen Maine Newspapers Inc.

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ON THE MAINE ROAD Columnist Bill Nemitz will be on the road until Labor Day weekend, reporting on people and places of interest in western and northern Maine. To top of story

MILO ­ Just about any way you look at it, the family of Gary and Nancy Metilly is different.

They have 11 kids with a 12th due any day now.

They home school each and every child.

They strictly adhere to the tenets of Messianic Judaism, which combines a literal interpretation of the Bible with the belief that Jesus Christ was in fact the Jewish messiah.

In short, they stand out. And in a small northern Maine town where many families go back many generations, you might think the Metillys would have a hard time, shall we say, fitting in.

But you'd be wrong.

"This is a life of faith," Gary, 40, said as his wife and children sat in a circle in the fading sunlight Thursday and feasted on spaghetti and fresh salad. "It's knowing and believing that God is going to do what He said He'll do as long as we do what we're supposed to do."

Want proof?

Behind Gary as he spoke loomed a 5,200-square-foot house that, if all goes well, will be finished by the time the snow flies. It replaces a 52-foot trailer with three makeshift additions ­ two made from hay bales ­ that burned to the ground in the same spot last March.

And every square inch has been donated.

The Metillys moved here six years ago from New Hampshire, settling first on rented land north of town. A year later, they managed to buy this piece of land two miles south of the village and, like a scene straight from the Old Testament, move their trailer, their tiny herd of sheep and cattle and their gaggle of giggling children onto it.

"I remember the day I walked a pair of steers six miles down the road," Gary recalled with a chuckle. "People saw my straw hat and full beard and thought we were Amish. Certainly we had everybody's attention."

For almost five years they made the best of what by any measure was a difficult situation: A huge family crammed into a tiny space that was too cold in the winter, too hot in the summer and too crowded all the time.

In addition to Gary and Nancy and a new baby that was due this weekend, there's Isaiah, 19; Elizabeth, 18; Jonathan, 17; Andrew, 14; Josiah, 13; Hannah, 10; Hadassah, 7; Miriam, 5; Ribqah, 3; Shamyah, 2; and Ezekiel, 15 months. Another son, 11-year-old Timothy, died of cancer four years ago. His marble headstone sits at the top of the driveway behind a white picket fence.

But despite the hardship and tragedy, the Metillys managed. Gary, who hopes to become a master electrician, picked up handyman jobs all over town. Nancy, whose only complaint about the trailer was that it was hard squeezing between the bunk beds and the crib when you're pregnant, tended to the children and the large family garden.

And the older boys did their part too. At least once a week, they'd rise at 2 a.m., bake anywhere from 40 to 60 loaves of bread in the trailer's tiny kitchen and then set out on their bicycles selling it door to door to townsfolk who'd never tasted bread quite so good ­ or met boys quite so nice.

"They're some of the best-raised kids I've ever seen," said Don St. Cyr, who owns a camp one driveway down from the Metillys. "Unbelievably nice kids." Not to mention resilient.

It was a typically raw morning in March. The boys were hard at work baking bread when Isaiah smelled smoke near the front door. Looking outside, he saw that a still-burning log, removed earlier from the wood stove because it was too big, had rolled down and ignited the outside wall of the trailer's straw-bale addition.

"All of a sudden, I hear the children calling to us," Nancy said. "And I could tell by the sound of their voices that something was definitely wrong."

Nancy quickly shepherded the kids outside, carefully counting heads as they passed. Gary grabbed the family's two fire extinguishers and emptied them onto the straw. But it was too late ­ the fire had already worked its way up into the roof of the trailer and took off from one end to the other.

Firefighters came from as far away as Dover-Foxcroft, but there was little they could do.

"We knew it was gone," Nancy said. "But we also knew God had something in store for us, something He was going to do for us."

Some might call it a miracle. Others would say it's simply a small town doing what it does best. But for the Metillys, what's happened in the days, weeks and months after the fire is simply an affirmation of deeply held faith.

First came the Red Cross with short-term housing. Then came John and Bonnie Bishop. They own land near the Metillys and had an empty two-bedroom house up in Brownville that they were planning to convert to office space for their nearby concrete business.

"It wasn't much of a choice," Bonnie said. "We had the house and they needed it. They're great people."

But the Bishops' generosity - the house came rent-free - was just the beginning. Within a week of the fire, neighbors had helped Gary clear all the debris from the lot. B&S Salvage from Hudson came up and carted off what couldn't be burned - free of charge.

Then Billy London, a local excavator, heard that the Metillys needed a foundation hole dug and told Gary, "Boy, I'd be tickled to do that for you." Again for free.

Next came Rich Johnson, who donated his and his crew's time to install a new foundation.

And with all of that came the clothes, the toys for the kids and, as the Metillys' story spread via local media and the Internet, the money.

"By the end of the first week, people had donated $10,000," Gary said, still amazed. "After three weeks, it was $30,000. I still have this donation from New Zealand ­ I need the bank to exchange it, but I'm told it's about $50."

Construction of the new home, designed by Gary on his computer, got a big boost this month when four men from Georgia, all master carpenters and Messianic Jews, traveled to Milo and spent a week framing walls, installing laminated beams and putting down floors. Townspeople turned out too ­ during a weekend "work party" earlier this month, Gary looked around and counted 17 volunteers.

"It's coming," he said, looking up at the house. "It's coming."

But it's not done yet. The roof still needs to go on - Gary's bought the trusses but cannot yet afford the shingles. Then he'll need windows, and plumbing, and wiring Š and Lord knows what else before the family can settle in for winter. (Donations can be sent to The Metilly Fire Fund, c/o Maine Savings Bank, P.O. Box 447, Milo 04463.)

When it's finished, the house will include a master bedroom and bath, two dormitory-style rooms with separate bathrooms upstairs - one for boys and one for the girls, a large kitchen and dining room, a full basement with a wood-fired boiler, a laundry room Š all thanks to a community that from the start embraced the Metilly family as one of its own.

Bonnie Bishop understands how some people might look at the Metillys and wonder why they believe what they believe, or why Gary and Nancy keep having children, or why they have to be so darned different.

But to focus on that, she said, is to miss the bigger point.

"If you come into contact with them, you understand," she said. "When you see them, they make you smile."

Watching the family join hands and sing in prayer before their spaghetti dinner Thursday, Don St. Cyr pondered a visitor's question: How does he explain this outpouring of generosity for people from away?

"I can't," St. Cyr replied. "This community just came out in droves. It's amazing." Staring at the house with no roof, he thought about it awhile.

"It's just like making bread," he finally said. "Everything sort of folded together - and then look what rose up."

Columnist Bill Nemitz can be reached at 791-6323 or at: bnemitz@pressherald.com.