You didn't think we'd let the NXT Desk reach the 2 year mark without celebrating, did you?

Wrong.

We've reached a landmark on The Scanner. For the first time the Scanner has dug up a use for bacon that even I'm not entirely comfortable with. That should tell you something.

Also, deep fried Cadbury Creme Eggs. That's when Easter hurts.

We just seem to be running behind schedule on the NXT Desk this week. Fear not, I think The Scanner will make up for it this week. It's got peeps, bacon, cute pets and a horrific new twist in The Snuggie.

It's not all basketball, Facebook and bacon around here this week. Oh no. Thanks to the Scanner that list now includes robots taking care of your grandparents and quitting your job via a tasty cake.

And canned bacon.

You know, when I first started up the Scanner a few years back, I really wasn't sure what to make of it. All I knew is I needed some place to collect and run down all the hilarious/awesome/bizarre/amazing stuff that pops up on the Internets.

There really is no other way to explain how Tom Brady's wife, a cover of Rush's "Limelight," Dr. Mario and more Facebook shame fit together.

Let's just cut to the chase: cats in bongs, McNugget emergencies, and attacks on Chuck E. Cheese? It's been a busy week for The Scanner.

When you flip the on switch to The Scanner each week it's impossible to know what you're going to get. How else could we end up with legislators trying Cocaine, a Twitter War, gold parties and ethical questions on porn?

The answer is meh.*

(*Why "Meh?" See below.)

Trends, fads, memes, whatever you want to call them, can be an ugly and tragic thing. Sure, they seem fun at first. We all laugh the first time we're Rickrolled or see a rip-off of LOLCATs.
But the "25 Things About Me" explosion that has threatened to pull the Internet into a black hole has become an interesting - and bizarre - phenomenon.

How do Michael Jackson's garage sale, the Large Hadron Collider, the Snuggie and booze "shot guns" all fit together?

In the Scanner of course. He insanity (and inanity) of a week's worth of the Interweb's best.

We're careening towards the end of another week, which means it's time to round-up some of the best morsels of entertainment (and bizarreness) from around the Interwebs.

The Scanner is up and running...and has bacon. (Of course.)

For the first time in a long time the Scanner was pumping out too much Internet goodness to be contained here. From Bacon Stupidity and MacGruber to bird-strike video games and politicians on Twitter.

If it keeps up at this rate I may have to start a mini daily scanner. Thoughts?

I'll freely admit the schedule around here on the NXT Desk has been a little off for a few weeks. But it looks like we're getting back to normal, and there's no better normal than the weekly Scanner.
On tap today: Nerd Merit Badges, Bacon Camp, Segway races and unicorns.

Thank you Internets. Thank you.

Let's run through a hypothetical situation here: You're a college baseball player at a Division I school who enjoys posting pictures from your weekend escapades on your Facebook page. Monday morning you wake up to a notice from the dean's office: you've violated the college's student code of conduct.

But how could they know? Because they're scanning Facebook.

Been busy working on a side-project lately that some of you may already know about it. We'll talk about it more tomorrow. But in the meantime, let The Scanner ease your overburdened mind. Let the bounty of the Internets wash over you.

First time I fired up the Scanner in 2009 and it ran like a dream. I take it as a good sign that no matter how times change or how crappy the economy gets, the Internet never seems to run out of hilarious, disturbing and downright bizarre stuff.

Dive in.

What a sweet, sweet bounty Internets. A little bacon, some German gymnastics, exploding Volvos and gifts for journalists.

The Scanner is a gift that keeps on giving.

After finally settling in back on the NXT Desk this week, it's time to fire up the Scanner once again. Luckily the Internet has an unending supply of trivial - and hilarious - information readily available for your consumption.

According to Google Trends, the phrase "Best Cyber Monday Deals" is a pretty hot search phrase right now.

Wonder why.

You thought the Scanner had disappeared, hadn't you? Be honest. I know I've been an absent minded professor around these parts with the election, but the good news is the election is over! There is some slightly less than good news, but we'll get into that soon enough.

In the meantime, let us wander through the dangerous and hilarious fields of the Interwebs.

The weekend that was, uh, was, a tiring one. Pop!Tech put a serious drain on the batteries, but I won't let that stop me from serving up some of things you may have missed in the last 72 hours.

If today's Monday Fix seems a little TV-heavy it's because there was a lot of action on the flat screen this weekend. Sports, politics (I guess that's on TV all the time now) and dancing moose, this weekend had it all.

My friends, I've been a bad, bad blogger, this I know. Last week was a hectic one here on the combined NXT/Political Affairs Desk. It's actually quite the messy desk at the moment. Last week I got tied up in election projects, including a few videos of the paper's endorsement interviews with Senate and Congressional candidates.

I'll try to make it up to you this week, I promise.

The Monday fix was a bit of a necessity for me this morning, as I was off in Chicago over the weekend and in somewhat of a media blackout. No news, no blogs, not even a single Tweet for two days.

Actually, that was kind of nice, now that I think of it.

In these unsure times of financial turmoil, rest assured that some things are always constant, like The Scanner.

That is until The Scanner becomes insolvent and has to file for bankruptcy or gets bought out by AOL, who in turn gets bought out by General Electric, and so on.

So, relax. Really.

In case you were wondering, Republican Presidential candidate McCain's campaign suspension has apparentlyset off a "suspension" fire on the Interwebs.

So in light of the situation, I am suspending the blog, but asking The Scanner to continue in my absence.

Oh sweet Internets, you'll never let us down. You're like the cow that never runs out of milk. Really, really bizarre, sometimes unfortunate, milk.

Uh...that means it's time for The Scanner!

Deep below a picturesque village on the Swiss/French boarder, scientists are toying with the very bits that may have started life in the universe.

Scientist! Toying! Universe! Doesn't anyone else see what this means?

SUPER SCIENCE!

We're back at full strength here on the NXT Desk, and we've got the Scanner all fired up and ready for another week's worth of fabulous Internet treasures.

A lot of things happened at ROFLCon a few weeks back. I gained a new understanding for LOLCats, my faith in Rick Astley wavered, I was blinded - and changed forever - by Leslie Hall's gem sweaters and I sat in the back of a science lecture hall and did not fall asleep, just to name a few.

But I also got to meet a lot of cool people.

Ask yourself these questions:
- Do you respect the force of nature that is Chuck Norris?
- Do you enjoy Stuff White People Like?
- Do you find cute pictures of cats and grammatically challenged headlines?

If so, there's something going on at M.I.T. this weekend you might be interested in.

This is what it's all about people - The Scanner. We all spend entirely too much time on the interwebs and want to share what we found.

Ain't that sweet?

Get an energy bar and a Red Bull, it's time for the weekly dose of all things tasty, techy and pop-culture-y (yes, that is not a word.).

Time for to fire up The Scanner.

Looking for that perfect last minute Valentine's Day gift?
TOO BAD. The Scanner does not care about your lack of planning or romantic love and laughs at you.

Oh Scanner, you're so scandalous.

Was there something going on at Portland High School yesterday?
I drove past there and it looked like the entire city was trying to get in there.

There is nothing quite like the fear, tension and unease you feel when you're hosting a Super Bowl party and things go south for the home town team and you've got few fans for the opposing team in attendance.

I didn't know whether to hide the booze, knives and easily flammable furniture, or as a neutral party (Vikings Fan) appeal to reason.

Oh we're back and getting better every day here on the NXT desk. A quick note for those of you who have asked and those that are just observant – the podcast is not dead, it's just on a short hiatus. With the holiday and some scheduling things we've been off the rails for a bit here. We'll be back up next week.

And with that, let's get into the good stuff: bacon, fast cars, paintball and "Fight Club" the musical.

Mr. Jones got to run solo last week and no one got injured. I'd say that's a win–win.
But even I'm not lazy enough to take another day off and let him run wild for a consecutive week.

So I'm back, the second chair to Mr. Videoport Jones, and his picks of this week's new DVD releases.

So, what did I miss?

Sure you like to think your time is precious, especially at work, but come on ... don't fight your inner procrastinator.

Succumb to The Scanner, it will waste your time in ways you won't feel so bad about.

Aside from today's bacon news – and really, what could be more important to me – here's a tasty round up of the bizarre, funny and otherwise curious from this week. It's The Scanner: With subtle hints of boysenberry aftertaste.

I know most of you are in full-fledge Thanksgiving & family mode, which as they say is the reason for the season.

Still, I'm a firm believer in the power of moderation – in food, booze and family, especially this week. So if you're looking for a few minutes diversion, here it is.

It's time once again for that weekly dose of fantasy and reality that makes reaching the weekend just a little more fun.

Or at least its a enough of a dose to tide you over until the work day ends and happy hour begins.

It's the Scanner - where time wasters and news sit side by side.

It's been a busy week here at NXT, what with all the Democracy in action, late nights, meat pies and cocktails.

Wait, that's another story entirely.

Anyway, I haven't been around blog-town much this week, and for that I apologize. Not that anyone's looking forward to a daily dose of NXT, but what good is this thing if I don't update it regularly?

It's been a busy week here at NXT, what with all the Democracy in action, late nights, meat pies and cocktails.

Wait, that's another story entirely.

Anyway, I haven't been around blog-town much this week, and for that I apologize. Not that anyone's looking forward to a daily dose of NXT, but what good is this thing if I don't update it regularly?

Somewhere in that giant piano lounge in the sky, there is a serious Broadway revival going on and a fresh bottle of scotch has just been cracked open.

Here's to you Mr. G.

After a brief - one week - hiatus, The Scanner has returned, chock full of all the useless, hilarious, and necessary things you needed to know, but did not know you needed to know.

You know?

Because the Internet demands it, because pop culture stops for no one...tt's time once again for The Scanner - where we promise to never try and steal back our memorabilia.

It's time for the Scanner - where all your YouTube shame finds new life as "educational videos."

We've got a lot to run through today, not just the typical crop of YouTubes, but also the results of the week-long 'mustache voting!

It's the day before Friday - just think of the hangover before going to happy hour tonight. It's also means its time for The Scanner: Where shame is the only currency.

Thursdays mean The Scanner - Twenty-five cent wings and cheap sarcasm until 10 p.m.

If it's Thursday then it must mean time for The Scanner - it's like an intervention, only more fun.

It's Thursday, which means it's time for The Scanner - All the Internet, now with 20 percent less spam.

Yeah, you read that right. Girls Gone Wild, as in "reliably-sketchy-
always-getting-sued-for-not-getting-girls'-permission
-to-air-their-drunken-exploits" "Girls Gone Wild."

When someone says "the dude abides," what exactly comes to your mind? Do you scratch your head, look at them strange, or perhaps say back "the Dude abides."

The Weekly Scanner - enough pop culture and bizarre news to smuggle in a speeding lobster boat.

Remember - if you've got weird news, websites, events or anything funky you catch online, send it my way it'll get in the Scanner.

We got a lot to get through today, first off, I think I look ripe for a guest spot on the Simpsons:

The Weekly Scanner - enough pop culture and bizarre news to smuggle in a speeding lobster boat.

Remember - if you've got weird news, websites, events or anything funky you catch online, send it my way it'll get in the Scanner.

We got a lot to get through today, first off, I think I look ripe for a guest spot on the Simpsons:

Muggle what? Seriously, I have no idea what you people are talking about and I don’t care who eats a magical bullet in the new book.

Ok, maybe that was a little harsh – (especially from a man who debated the merits of "Transformers" – which was awesome by the way.) but I have remained largely immune to Potter-mania over the last few years.

We hear at The Skateboarding Times take our job seriously – to bring you the most up-to-date news on skateboarding, skate parks and the struggle against the anti-skateboarding establishment.

Ah yes, another summer Friday in Portland.

Bars, decks and all that is golden. Which begs the question again, what makes for a good summer time bar? I’m going to keep asking until we get a conversation going, and I know there are people out there who like to enjoy beer and assorted cocktails.

What? A day without some sort of skateboarding news? For a guy who didn’t skateboard growing up, I seem to be talking about it a lot lately.