It feels strange to talk about the weekend since I've only been in the office two days. But here it is.

Alas, thanks to a sinus infection I missed two awesome events this week - the showing of "Planet B-Boy" over at SPACE and "The Big Lebowski" over at One Longfellow Square. If ever there was a place to start talk about Lebowski Fest Portland, that was it.

Also, I feel the need to mention that there is a "Star Wars" theme dance party taking place at Bubba's tomorrow night. Now, obviously this is something I could dedicate an entire post to, but if you've received or seen one of the fliers around town (hastily scratched out in what looks like pen, no graphics, not even a lightsaber), you'll know that it does not exactly inspire "A New Hope."

I'm torn on this one. On one hand I could bust out my Lando Calrissian wig and cape. On the other I've got no reassurances it won't be some sort of joke (and a waste of my Lando cape.)

Still, it could end up being the party of the year. Trust the Force on this one.

FRIDAY

• This weekend seems to be all about the Phoenix's Best Music Poll showcases around Portland. Highway Jackson and Meantone at Amigos starting at 10 p.m. It's a $5 entry.

• Another Best Music Poll smash-up down at Empire: Hiss & Chambers with even more dance sets from DJ j.hjort, C. Money Burns and more. Starts at 9 p.m. and it's $5.
  

SATURDAY

• SPACE Gallery pulls double duty tonight, backing a Phoenix Best Music Poll show and their regular Hometown Heroes series with performances by The Cambiata, Cougars Kill Cobras and The Rattlesnakes. Doors open at 8:30 p.m. for the show starting at 9. It's $5 entry and 18 plus.

• The undefeated Maine Roller Derby squad is going up against The Connecticut Stepford Sabbatage in their quest for a perfect spring season. Much like the Patriots the derby squad has crushed opponents this season, so hopefully no one goes to the league and accuses them of recording signals. As always good fun, drinks, food, live music (from Lady Kensington & The Beatlords as well as the WPB crew) and good old-fashioned thumpings. Tickets are $10 in advance, $12 at the door and $5 for kids.

• I hate to keep plugging for another publication, but a good show is a good show. Here's another great line up courtesy of the BMPies - Boondocks, Nicotine and Graymatter serving up hip-hop, soul, funk and maybe a little house on the side at the White Heart. It's the DJ crew portion of your Best Music entertainment. Show starts at 9 p.m.
  

Finally here's your weekend video, or in this case videos. Even home sick I could not hide from some of the biggest online videos of this week, Bill O'Rilley's "Inside Edition" blow-up from more than a decade ago. Now, I can't show it here because it's got enough F-bombs to level a warehouse, but it's too funny to pass up. This one is for mature audiences only, I cannot stress that enough. This is highly NSFW, so proceed only with headphones or in the safety of your own home.

Laughing Squid has the original video and Stephen Colbert's equally hilarious take on it.

And to put things over the top you need to watch this O'Reilly Remix courtesy of blog Towleroad.

WE'LL DO IT LIVE!

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