We’re talking about the big S (and I suppose the big E and the big X) today, which is a topic that always grabs people’s attention. That counts double when you combine the words “sex” and “teens.”

What today's column gets at is that there is a constant, never-ending debate about sex vs. abstinence, and who’s doing what (or who) and why.

Now, it’s important to point out that the Roman Catholic youth ministry convention this weekend is not solely focused on abstinence. There'll be workshops on becoming a missionary, going into the priesthood and life after high school.

But what’s interesting is that the workshops were selected by young people, so clearly this is something they want to talk about.

Keeping it in your pants: You may have already heard of True Love Revolution, the pro-abstinence group started by Justin Murray and Sarah Kinsella on the Harvard campus. They’ve gotten a fair amount of attention for it, which the two 22-year-old seniors attribute to the fact that don’t think of colleges (let alone Harvard) as a place of sexual restraint. Needless to say, they’ve gotten their share of supporters, as well as those who don’t see eye-to-eye on the virtues of "savin' it."

What do bees have to do with this: In Feburary Planned Parenthood launched a campaign aimed at getting parents in the Portland area to talk to “the young people” about “the sex.”

The campaign, which was also nationwide, was called “Real Life Real Talk,” and tried to take off some of the pressure, fear and awkwardness that can take place parents and kids try to have “the talk.” According to Lauren Grousd, who oversees “Real Life Real Talk” in the Portland area, they held sex-ed classes for parents and teens, and some specifically for parents. The point, as Grousd explained in the column, is to cut through all the controversy and just talk to young people about being safe and healthy.

And in case you missed “When Turtles Make Love,” a play about the sometimes funny, sometimes frightening communication gap between young people and their parents, the play will return for an encore next week. Produced by local nonprofit Add Verb Productions, the show takes place at 7 p.m. Tuesday at Portland High School. Tickets available through Real Life Real Talk.

Always check your stats: Since we’re talking about the sex, I thought a quick look at stats on sex and teens were in order. According to the state's 2005 Maine Youth Risk Behavior Survey, 16 percent of middle school students and 45 percent of high school students reported having had sex, that’s out of 1,480 middle school students and 1,375 high school students.

Of the high school students who were sexually active, 59 percent said they'd used a condom. Out of the high school girls who were sexually active, 41 percent said they used birth control pills or other contraception.

Who taught you this: I had sex-ed in 10th grade health class…taught by the woman who doubled as gym teacher and volleyball coach. That was just over 10 years ago, and the debate then is the same as now: What do we teach them, how do we teach them, do they need to learn it at all.

While some would like to have sex-ed feature the full menu – where babies come from, why your body’s freaking out on you, contraceptives, birth control, sexually transmitted infections, abstinence - some would rather see an abstinence-only education.

The issue has gone back in forth in Maine’s school districts. Last year there was a minor controversy in Westbrook as the Westbrook School Department decided that middle school students would learn about contraception.
The state has also rejected money from the federal government for abstinence-only programs.

Making things more interesting is a federal study released over a week ago, that said students in abstinence-only programs were just as likely to have sex as students who did not take the courses.

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